This is the number one question that I get asked: “Sure, I know I need to ask for a raise, but how?” or “I know, I know, I need to raise my fees. I just don’t know how to ask.”
And what is this ‘how’ we’re seeking?
It’s the words.
You want to know what script, what string of words will ensure that you don’t have to do any internal work before you summon the courage and make the ask. And I’m here to tell you: there is no script that cancels out internal work. There is no string of words that will make you more courageous. That’s putting the cart before the horse.
Take a moment and focus inside. Breathe deeply, close your eyes if you need to. Focus on what you want – think about what it would look like to have what you want. Allow yourself to believe that you can have what you want. Now, ask yourself: what am I using to prevent myself from getting what I want?
Breathe again and see yourself asking – confidently, clearly, and courageously.
Now open your eyes and answer this: what is the question you need to ask to get what you want?
I think you already know the words.
You already know the question.
The quality of the answer you receive is a direct result of the quality of the question you present. Asking a fearful question will not yield an answer grounded in confidence. Consider what you’re bringing to the table when you ask. Consider what will resonate with the person you’re asking. Consider your specific message and what others need to know in order to give you what you want. Consider all these things and then, ask.
I know you can – I’ve seen countless women just like you ask better questions. And so, get better answers than they ever thought possible.
You can, too.
PS – Are you looking for a place to practice courageous questions? I’d love to help you drill down on your internal work to prepare to make that ask you’ve been planning. I postponed my Atlanta Lunch+Learn – there’s still time to join me and a host of other accomplished, talented women who want to do the work before they make their ask. Join us by registering here.
How to Ask For a Ra
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